Momadonna Makeover

Whenever the moms get together something happens and it’s always a surprise, especially to us. Just the other day we had a birthday party for Bitch’s Accessory. You remember the one, he didn’t like being 37? This was doubly true when Bitch was done with him. She would tell everyone including strangers: “This is my boyfriend. He is 5 years older than me. He is 37.” Well, for his birthday we were going out. So the Momadonnas decided to get together and finalize their action plan for the evening.

Upon reaching Ringleaders house, Bitch declared, “I’m taking a shower.” Now this isn’t something you would hear everyday, but it happens to be common when Bitch is involved, so Ringleader handed her a towel as Bitch was busy explaining how she was saving time by taking a shower AT Ringleaders house. So Bitch took a shower right then and there. When she was all clean and shiny she came out to the kitchen and pulled out what can only be described as a bag of magic. It was full of mom toys and infinite possibilities (ok it was full of makeup).

Slowly she pulled out her supplies and stacked them on the counter. Picture the grand Thanksgiving feast your grandma used to make but with makeup instead of food spread across the table. As far as the eye can see were shades of reds, blues, browns and greens. The other moms took turns oohing and ahhing as Bitch worked her magic. Then suddenly Bitch looked up from her own prepping and said, “Want me to do you up?”

As you know, no one can say no to Bitch, so before you could blink she had Punk and Ringleader sitting down getting re-vamped. This not only included make up – oh no! There was eyebrow plucking and wine as well. Thinking back it may have been the wine that started it and not really Bitch at all. After Bitch poked and prodded the other moms for an hour, they were deemed presentable and therefore ready for the party. Nothing like a new look to give you attitude! The Accessories didn’t even mind…of course they don’t notice either.