Friday (5:15 PM)– The bet is on….
Today was a breeze! The bet (that I can spend one week without eating cheese) started today at 5 PM. It has been soooo easy, maybe I will make it longer? I’m so excited! I can’t wait to see how it goes!!!
Saturday – Preoccupation
Today was a bit harder; everywhere I went there was cheese. The vending machine only had cheese flavored chips, the pizza guy in the food court yelled at me, I think there was a full moon and Green Bay will be playing tomorrow! That said I still didn’t eat any cheese. I feel good. I can do this!
Sunday - Insomnia
Today wasn’t bad, but I don’t seem to be sleeping well…dreams about a giant cheese chasing me. I ran and ran but I couldn’t seem to move. I guess I was stuck in Alfredo sauce, funny it made sense in my dream. I hope tonight is better. Still no cheese.
Monday – Mood Swings
Today was great, well good, no-no it totally sucked. It’s hard to find food that wouldn’t taste better with cheese on it. It was definitely an up and down day. I enjoyed an evening with the family but caught myself crying at Tillamook commercials. Well I guess I should be proud I mean I’m still doing this right? No I’m not proud I’m mad - I mean what was I thinking?
Tuesday – The Shakes
Today has- been hard@er I can”t seem*= to ty-pe and My focus iS off. I missss %my cheese bUt still have#’’not eAten a&ny.
Wednesday – Anxiety
What if I fail? What will happen to my family? How can they survive knowing I lost the bet? Everyone will find out then Bitch will find me….How am I going to get through this? Is it even possible?
Thursday – Paranoia
Ring Leader left town, it’s because of me isn’t it. She said it was a race but she just doesn’t want to be around me now that I’m off cheese. Without cheese we don’t have anything in common anymore and she’s done with me. Wait The Professional hasn’t called today! She calls everyday! Oh no, she is in on it and she is leaving me too! Or not? Are they testing me? Watching and waiting to see what I do? That’s it I’m moving into the basement right now! Where is the tinfoil for my windows?
Friday - Hallucinations
I should have known I was in trouble when the cheese in the refrigerator started talking to me, but I didn’t heed the warning signs. By the time I finished work things had gone from bad to worse. All I can say is the fountain at the mall is NOT made of melted cheese and those cute little cheesy macaroni men running away from you are probably just scared children. Needless to say mall security let me go and now its 5PM and I’ve made it through the week! I’m proud, I’m successful and I’m exhausted. To quote the immortal words of Chester Cheetah “it ain’t easy bein’ cheesy”
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