The Professional

The Professional

The Professional like any group who would like to be taken seriously The Momadonnas have added The Professional. Our The Professional’s nickname is based off of the 1994 movie of the same name and like that professional ours is an assassin who can kill you with a look. Ok, well maybe not all of you, but definitely a few men especially if she is single like ours is. Think Posh Spice from the spice girls. She is a well-dressed, good-looking, multi-faceted woman who knows when to add a few dashes (see – and – above) in order to make a good impression. The Group’s The Professional is an actual a professional. It’s true, she doesn’t just look the part she is well educated with an office and everything! Just the kind of person you need in your group to lend credibility and keep the group looking respectable. This brings us to the point. The Professional’s job IS to make the group look respectable. Not that we are in any way respectable. We would never go for that. However, we have found that at times it does come in handy to LOOK respectable. When you are able to pull off the whole “respectable” thing you may find you can get away with a lot more. Once we were even able to sneak Momasotas (Our own pet name for Mimosas but just for us moms…)into a “dry” spa while we had mud raps done. I can tell you we must have looked very respectable to get away with that! Well its either that or four muddy women are just too scary to say no to.

You will notice the name is always THE Professional. You have to add the THE. Yes it is mandatory. It also totally makes the name. Try it. Go ahead. For example say, “oh hey my friend professional said….” As you can see it just doesn’t have the right vibe. Now try “THE Professional warned me about this..…” Oh yes, you get that little shiver down your back now don’t you. Having added a THE makes it more serious and maybe (depending on your mood) dangerous! We Momadonnas do love a bit of danger especially with a side of cheese fries. If you didn’t feel the chill rest assured that with a name like THE Professional you will always have at least some attitude on your side. The Momadonnas find attitude works better in most situations anyway. Being The Professional is not all danger and adventure. Our The Professional is also the group’s skilled orator. As you know all groups need a member to represent their communication skills. The Professional’s responsibilities include this function as well. As a group, however, we have noticed our The Professional is mostly responsible for telling us we have A.D.D. In fact, she is often required to ask us to finish our original story before we distract each by commenting on one of our passing fancies. Think of a conversation with a four year old. Here is an example of one of our conversations: “For the party tonight you will need to bring, oh look at the bird isn’t it big, did you talk to Diane today?” This goes on for some time. Someone has to rein us in. The Professional is perfect for these instances. That said there are also times when we do get serious. When this happens we may need to sit down and talk. The Professional has added this to her duties. She cannot only comfort anyone but she will do so with a straight face. That can’t be easy! In fact the Momadonnas decided, as a prerequisite to becoming “The Professional” in any group, that applicant has to take a class on pretending to pay attention to outrageous stories. Another class would be “How to listen without rolling your eyes 101”. Now eye rolling is a useful skill that all members of the Group have cultivated, but we agree with The Professional and try not to do it too often. In fact, we have delegated this responsibility to the minions (our kids). It is just their kind of job.